Healing Is Possible after an Abortion
Abortion can be one of the most traumatic experiences in a person’s life. Feelings of sadness, anxiety, guilt, anger and grief are common, not only for the woman, who undergoes an abortion, but also for the man involved, for relatives, friends, counselors and even medical personnel.
You or someone you know may be one of these women or men whose lives have been touched by an abortion months or years ago. Those who experience abortion are often led to believe that abortion is merely a physical procedure that carries no significant emotional aftereffects. Indeed, some individuals experience initial relief following an abortion. Others feel immediate and intense sadness. The pain of loss may initially be buried, sometimes for years, but can manifest itself in relationship difficulties, depression, or other psychological or spiritual struggles. Whatever a person’s experience, most come to realize that he/she has never really come to peace with the decision. There are physical, emotional and spiritual effects.
Feelings of sadness, anger, guilt and regret may be threatening to overwhelm the person who’s had an abortion, or they may be buried deep down inside. Outwardly, life may appear tranquil and productive, but inwardly he/she may carry a silent sorrow. Since the abortion(s) a woman may have given birth to other children, and the joy of welcoming those children has possibly brought back painful memories as she looks back at the pregnancy(ies) that were terminated. Other losses or crises can break open the pain that has never healed.
This healing does not happen all at once, but rather in stages. Many women and men have experienced initial healing when they were able to talk about the abortion(s) in counseling, on an ACTS retreat or in the sacrament of reconciliation. That healing is an important beginning. And beyond there is healing from the shame that lies deep within that’s essential.
Few people in our popular culture acknowledge abortion as a death experience that requires grieving. Increasing numbers of psychologists, clergy and women’s health clinicians are coming to realize that post-abortion pain comes in part from a denied opportunity to grieve the life that was lost. For Christian believers, the pain of abortion is often intensified by a sense of alienation from both God and the Church.
Is abortion a painful part of your past? Are you still struggling to find peace months or years after the choice? If so, there are several ways to continue healing.
First, the Rachel’s Vineyard Retreat offers women and men hurting from past abortions an opportunity to look back on those experiences through the eyes of faith. The retreat provides a safe, supportive and structured setting which invites participants to reflect upon all that led to and followed after their abortion(s). In this way participants can come to better understand and deal with present difficulties which may connect back to the abortion episode(s). It offers a non-judgmental environment where women and men can express, release and reconcile painful post-abortive emotions to begin the process of restoration, renewal and healing. It can help you experience God's love and compassion on a profound level.
While the spirituality of Rachel’s Vineyard is Christian, and specifically Catholic, participants do not have to be currently involved in the Church to take part in the retreat. Any woman or man who is open to being touched by the loving and merciful God revealed in Jesus Christ can begin the journey toward healing by entering into Rachel’s Vineyard Retreat experience.
The next Rachel’s
Vineyard Retreats will be in
There are women and men in our diocese whom you can call
knowing you will receive a compassionate response: in Juneau,
Finally, if you would like to read more on post-abortion healing, consider When the Crying Stops: Abortion, the Pain and the Healing by Kathleen Winkler, Forbidden Grief: The Unspoken Pain of Abortion by Theresa Burke or Shame: Spiritual Suicide by Vicki Underland-Rosow, Ph. D. The websites listed below, also, offer helpful information and offer a safe place to begin the healing journey.
Healing after an abortion is possible. While it is not an easy journey, it need not be taken alone.
Excellent Resource Links for Post-Abortion
Healing
Feminists for Life of
Project Rachel (www.hopeafterabortion.org) is the name of the Catholic Church's healing ministry to those who have been involved in abortion. Project Rachel operates as a network of professional counselors and priests, all trained to provide one-on-one spiritual and psychological care for those who are suffering because of an abortion.
Rachel's Vineyard (http://www.rachelsvineyard.org/) is a safe place to renew, rebuild and redeem hearts broken by abortion. Weekend retreats offer you a supportive, confidential and non-judgmental environment where women and men can express, release and reconcile painful post-abortive emotions to begin the process of restoration, renewal and healing.
Ramah International (http://www.ramahinternational.org/) is a non-profit ministry designed to:
- Offer the hope of healing to those struggling with a past abortion decision
- Minister to those in crisis pregnancy situations who are considering abortion by outlining the emotional, spiritual, psychological and physical side-effects of abortion, as well as offering physical and emotional support through referrals to local pregnancy care centers.
- Educate, equip and encourage those working with post-abortive individuals within pregnancy care centers, individual ministries and churches.